“Sometimes a relationship ends on your last breath and sometimes it ends before that, and that’s okay.” – Hoda Katob
When you begin a relationship, whether that is dating, marriage or a committed partnership, you don’t necessarily think of how that relationship will end. You didn’t envision the day you’d be sitting in court with your attorney listening to the story of your relationship be told, yet here you are. A flood of emotions run through you. You question whether you were a good spouse and a good parent. It’s not the way you thought this would end.
Where do you go from here? Grieving the loss of what once was and looking forward to an unknown future. Accepting that the family you once knew and the future you hoped for has significantly changed is a hard pill to swallow. In the midst of the stress and turmoil that comes with ending a romantic relationship where attorneys and judges are involved, its hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. That light, even when it’s dim and you can barely see it, has been there all along. It is what your attorneys have been working toward all along: coming to the conclusion of your case that puts you and your family on a better path forward.
Your case will conclude either by an agreement being reached or the judge coming to a decision. Whichever way your case concludes, those final orders will be your roadmap and determine your next steps in your journey forward. It may be tempting to agree to anything and everything that might be offered to you to just finalize your case just to be finished with the litigation and to have that certainty that final orders bring. Many people have walked the path before you and have agreed to terms that haunt them when all is said and done.
The fortitude it takes to make it through a contentious divorce is a challenge that each individual is faced with. Each person must hold on to the understanding that the litigation is first temporary and second necessary to put you and your family on a path to a better future. You might feel the short-term relief of your case ending by coming to an agreement however the impact of the agreement being on your ex’s terms will impact you for the months and years to come. Divorce requires you to temporarily sit in the in between, uncomfortable, often times painful places and letting that be okay for the long term gain of a pathway forward that best serves you and your family.