A whole new year is just a few days away. When you reflect back on this
past year, you can’t help but think about what you don’t want
to duplicate in the coming one.
Like everything under the sun, different people handle similar issues in
many different ways. For example, in losing weight, some will exercise,
some will diet, some will wish hard for something different to happen,
some will have another plate of nachos.
In test taking, some will put in the time each day, rationing out the work
necessary until the big day comes, some will decide that they work better
by cramming all the information in at the last possible minute, and some
people will hold the attitude of “book? What book? All I need to
know the professor said in class. Now if I had only attended more classes.”
In gardening, some will nurse a poor, wilted, half eaten plant through
thick and thin, trying moist soil, dry soil, rich soil, poor soil; others
will try a bit, perceive that they aren’t getting anywhere and yank
the plant out by the roots; time to try a different one. Still others
won’t bother with plants in the first place.
None of these methods are wrong, though some probably have a higher likelihood
of producing positive results.
The same goes for relationships. Some folks dream big, believing that they
are entitled to happiness. They take strides to find happiness and create
it for themselves. Some folks only worry about their happiness when its
absence is thrown in their face, then they hustle to fix the crisis. Still
other folks don’t ever worry. Life as is (however that is) is fine as is.
None of these approaches are wrong. Some probably have a higher likelihood
of producing happiness, if that’s a value to you in the first place.
So what’s bugging you? What didn’t work in 2015 that you’d
like to correct in 2016? If your answer is “nothing,” then
fantastic, you’ve achieved the level of Bodhisattva and I envy you.
If you have a gnawing feeling that things between you and your significant
other aren’t quite right, but don’t really want to invest
the time to figure it out right now, watch out! You are listening to a
rattlesnake shake its rattle and will soon enough experience the other
end of that snake.
On the other hand, if you would like to actively build a much better 2016,
you can definitely do so. If you still have a dancing partner (someone
who is willing to dance with you), there are wonderful steps you and your
dancing partner can take to samba seamlessly. However, if your erstwhile
dancing partner more often chooses to "sit this one out," you’ve
got to rescue yourself. Your pursuit of happiness begins and ends with
you. Isn't happiness a significant value, a prime virtue? Doesn't
your happiness make so much more possible?
Take this week. Think life through. Make resolutions. Create plans. Build
sand castles or draw lines in the sand, whichever works best for you.
But be intentional. Be decisive. And thereby be successful.
2016 can be your year.